Historical April 1998 article. Dates, prices, services and contacts describe the source period; current availability has not been established.
How do you spend your idle time? Oh.
I know what you’re thinking to yourself, “Idle time, I don’t have any!” And in a way, that’s true, The pace of life has picked up considerably. Everything happens faster, if not better.
In fact, not better for sure. And not only is the pace more frenetic, both the opportunities and responsibilities that consume our time have increased as well.
There used to be three St. Louis television stations, then four, and it wasn’t too long ago when we just had five (2, 4, 5, 9, and 11).
Now there are more channels than you can shake a remote at.
A different issue, of course, is whether the plethora of channels has increased the quality of offerings.
In a word, NYET!
Now we can watch “My Mother, the Car” with Tommy Smothers on four channels. And there is rerun after rerun, from Laugh-In to Lost In Space to Baywatch. (Hmmm, maybe all these channels aren’t so bad, after all!) And because the pace has picked up, we’re expected to not only do more but to do it faster.
When was the last time you were in a restaurant — a real one, not one where you ordered and carried a plastic tray to your table — when during the meal you didn’t hear someone at a table nearby talking on a cellular phone? Give me a break! Driving down the highway on a lonely country road no longer offers solace; you do have a car phone, don’t you?
Now we can’t even escape to be with ourselves by going out to dinner. Still, despite these ever-quickening intrusions, we do have idle time.
It has just changed form. What used to be a relaxing weekend or a quiet evening at the fort has now become a few minutes spent walking the dog, time on the Nordic Track to sweat and reflect, or, even, time in the shower while humming show tunes and twirling the soapon-a-rope.
The minutes are few and far between, but they’re there, In fact, precisely because idle time, the leisure moment or two. comes along so rarely, we need to be prepared to maximize its use.
We need to plan for the unplanned, structure the spontaneous, work at relaxing. Charge!
I suggest. dear reader, that we prepare ahead of time by having a list of topics that we would like to consider when we have that spare moment or two. Rather than wasting an opportunity by watching a bird or observing a sunset, we should capitalize on the moment and ruminate on an issue that we’d otherwise never have the time to consider.
I have such a list in my trusty auto, between the cracked Fleetwood Mac CD case and pile of ceegar wrappers.
It simply contains things that I might like to think about when the opportunity arises, such as while pausing at a stoplight, waiting for the debris from an accident to be picked up at Skinker and Delmar, or sitting in the car while the first wife makes a quick trip to the shoe repair shop on Pershing Avenue.
In my humble fashion, I’ve titled the list Questions For Our Time.
I offer it now, to you, as a public service, in the hope that you, too, can maximize your efficiency, as well as learning to use, as I have, as you can see, as many commas as possible in a sentence, without totally precluding its meaning, at least I hope; Feel free to cut out this list and put it in your car — – or on your Nordic Track — as well. (Hint: If it is going to go on the Nordic Track, and if you’re as out of shape as I am, you may want to laminate it.) QUESTIONS FOR OUR TIME 1.
I often wonder about what people from the past would think about today’s society.
If Abraham Lincoln were to step out of a time capsule today, coming back from the past, what would he think? What would Washington think? Ben Franklin? Or how about Columbus? Rush Limbaugh? 2. How many articles of clothing are there in the world?
I mean, if all of the zillions upon zillions of shirts and pants that are hanging in stores waiting to be purchased were distributed at once, would, like, everyone’s closet be full? 3. How many angels can dance on the head of a pin at once? Why would an angel even want to dance on the head of a pin? 4.
If all of these major league sports teams are losing money, why does their value increase and why do people continue to buy them? And why do the people who buy them get richer? 5.
If we can put a man on the moon and continue to make marijuana illegal, why can’t we figure out a way to make fine tasting chocolate that doesn’t contain calories? 6.
If Babe Ruth were alive today, would he be a baseball player?
If Abe Lincoln were alive, would he be a politician?
If Dick Gebhardt were alive, would he regret his vote on the 1986 Tax Reform Act which devastated rehabilitation in urban areas, including St. Louis? 7. Why can’t we figure out a way to use River Des Peres for recreational purposes? 8.
With all these stars in the universe, as many as there are grains of sand in the world, each being part of a solar system, how could there not be life somewhere else?
When we ultimately find life, what effect will that have on us? And will the new life forms know about bagels? 9. Did FDR know about the plans to attack Pearl Harbor beforehand but let it happen to enable the U.S. to enter WWII? 10. Why are some men so bothered about losing their hair? 11. Would proiessional hockey have any fans if they outlawed fighting? 12. How did people think before there were words? 13. Why don’t some people think now, even though they have words? 14.
If we could require people to be licenced before allowing them having children, what would we want them to do to “earn” the licence? 15. How many years will Larry Hughes play for the Bills before turning pro? 16. How would our country be di f. ferent, from language to architecture to the constitution, if it had been settled from the west, by Asians coming across the Pacific Ocean in 1620, rather than in the east by Europeans coming from the Atlantic? 17. Do the people who are always taking videotapes of everything they do while on vacations, like standing in line and going on rides at DisneyWorld, for example, really sit and watch all of these tapes? 18. How come all foreigners have funny accents when they try to speak English? 19. How come as I get older, everything hurts in the morning? 20. Why does the water go down the drain in a different direction depending upon whether it is above or below the equator?
There ’tis. Enjoy waiting at those long red lights! And let me know if you have any questions to add to my list.
Originally published in The Times of Skinker-DeBaliviere, April 1998.
Read this article in the original newspaper issue.
Original source: SD_Times1998_04.pdf, printed page(s) 8; PDF page(s) 8.
