I want to write about democracy.
One of the fundamental principles of democracy is your right to know. I got to thinkin’ about that the other night, and just got all riled ’cause there’s a lot of folks ’round here whose right to know is being ravished. That’s right! Ravished! Right here in ROSEDALE-SKINKER!
I’m talkin’ about those of you who can’t make it to neighborhood meetings, ’cause your home watchin the neighbor’s kids or “Bridget Loves Bernie” or sumpin. I ain’t knockin’ why you weren’t there or the fact that you weren’t there. Democratic groups are based on your right to seek your own level of involvement. And ROSEDALE-SKINKER is democratic — even tho’ no one can find the by-laws to prove it.
I’m talkin’ about your right to know — to know what goes on at those meetings. You have a right to know — even if you don’t wanna. So, I’m gonna tell you what happened last Saturday night — like it or not!
SETTING: Saint Roch’s Parish Hall
ATMOSPHERE: Good spirits have been established with “spirits”. (Enter the CHAIR — he’s the one who finished eating first.)
CHAIR: Hrumph! Now that we’re finished with the old business, is there any new business?
RESIDENT #1: I’d like to discuss changing the name from ROSEDALE-SKINKER to DESPERES-SKINKER, because the people east of Rosedale don’t feel part of this group. That’s why they don’t participate.
(Chorus sings, “TIMES THEY ARE A CHANGIN”)
RESIDENT #2: I move we change our name to DESPERES-SKINKER
(Chorus begins humming softly) (CHAIR, thinking his job is done, exits to TABLE and fills plate)
RESIDENT #3: I’d like to amend that motion to read ROSEDALE-SKINKER-DESPERES. If we’re gonna change, it should be based on tradition.
(Chorus softens even more.)
RESIDENT #4: I second that motion.
RESIDENT #5: (To wife) Which motion is she talkinn about?
RESIDENT #6: (To husband) Watch my purse….I’m going to the ….
(Humming grows louder.)
RESIDENT #2: I withdraw my motion in favor of the new motion, if my friend will withdraw his second to my motion.
RESIDENT #4: Which motion are you withdrawing which I seconded …. to which you want me to ….withdraw .. my … second….to ….s ……. ?????
RESIDENT #6: Do we have a parliamentarian?
RESIDENT #4: I second that.
(TIMES THEY ARE A CHANGIN humming dies)
RESIDENT #7: Look- those people on the 6000 blocks aren’t gonna participate no matter what. TRADITION! That’s what’s important. We got a good name, people recognize it. I don’t think it oughta change.
(Second chorus — stands and sings “TRADITION”)
RESIDENT #8: Now, if you really want to get participation, I move we change the name to DELMAR-DESPERES-LINDELL-SKINKER-WASHINGTON-WESTMINSTER-KINGSBURY-MCPHERSON-WATERMAN-PERSHING-ROSEDALE….
(Second chorus hums softly, “TRADITION”)
RESIDENT #9: Don’t forget Norfolk Western Railroad.
(Second chorus humming dies)
RESIDENT #4: I second that.
(CHAIR exits left to TABLE again)
RESIDENT #11: Who’s recording secretary. I think we need to get all this down.
RECORDING SECRETARY: I got it all in my head.
RECORDING SECRETARY’s WIFE: I second that!
RESIDENT #1: (Obviously wishing he was at TABLE with CHAIR) Anyone wanna talk about dogs?????
RESIDENT #2: You can by defoliant at the hardware store.
Well, that’s democracy … and so much for your right to know. This example of democracy in action did come to a logical conclusion when ROSEDALE-SKINKER decided the most democratic thing to do was to “TAKE IT TO THE PEOPLE.”
So, now you know. If you have any suggestions on a new name … or anything, write it on a piece of paper and tell your executive committee what you think. THAT’S DEMOCRACY.
Originally published in The Paper, Summer 1973.
Read this article in the original newspaper issue.
Original source: SD_Times1973_06.pdf, printed page(s) 4.
